Bifulco Holiday Letter: December 2012

Greetings from our home in the hinterlands...

Another year has flown by, leaving us to wonder “what the heck just happened?”

Willie is going to dazzle you with another of his famous holiday missives, so I will keep my contribution this year short. The highlights of the year…

We got to visit all our parents this year, which was great. Off to AL in January to visit Willie’s family, and out to OR to see my folks in July. Willie was able to make several additional trips in to Alabama during the year, and we were even able to get his mom up here for a visit. Unfortunately, while she was here, Hurricane Sandy blew into town, knocking out our power (and heat and water) for 5 days. Fortunately, other than being cold and annoyed, we were fine.

Willie continued to race this year and had one of his best races ever at Watkins Glen in the fall. The car is tucked away for the winter now, but will be brought out of mothballs (literally) in the spring. At that point, you may hear all sorts of manly grunting and other noises emanating from our neighborhood as the He Man Racing team gets the car ready for the 2013 season.

As for me, I continue to pursue my passion for photography by taking pictures of birds, animals, insects, flowers and nearly anything else that crosses my path. I bought a big zoom lens this year, which I’ve dubbed “Big Daddy” and it goes almost everywhere with me. I entered a few contests during the year, including the NJ State Fair, where I won 3rd place in the Fauna division! I also completed a challenge I’d given myself of taking at least one photo every single day for 365 straight days, earning me a nice story in the local paper. I enjoyed that challenge so much that I’ve decided to go for 730 days.

My brain scans have continued to come out “clean” and next spring will mark 5 years since the Great Brain Tumor Adventure. After this next scan, I can go to every couple of years instead of yearly which will be nice since I view the MRI as the Tunnel of Terror. I'm happy to report that we are both in good health other than the usual aches and pains that accompany middle age. Which neither of us is admitting to, incidentally!

The cats are fit and keep us entertained. Phoebe continues to be the quintessential flower child who thinks that the entire world is here for her entertainment and pleasure; while Rocket continues to think that everyone and everything is out to get him. Yep, he’s out little Conspiracy Theorist with a flair for drama.

And, now, here’s Willie…

Whew, finally.... At 51 years old, I have everything I could possibly need and I’m finally comfortable in my skin, albeit loose, and in several places free from the burden of hair. Yep, no need to keep up with the latest style of hair dryers any longer, nor am I concerned about the proper length so as not to run afoul of corporate compliance officers.

It’s very freeing actually. But there’s another benefit to having reached this point in life. Holidays and special occasions are more about spending time with the ones you love, and not about what gifts you secretly hope you’ll receive. Not that I don’t like gifts! Who doesn’t like gifts? Man, I LOVE gifts…and the more expensive and unencumbered they are, the better!

But as I think back over previous gift-receiving occasions, I find myself trying to suppress an uncontrollable eyelid twitch. Not sure how, but I think it has to do with the infrequently discussed concept of Conditional Gift Giving (CCG). For some, this is foreign, so an explanation alone would not suffice. It was different back in the day. You really needed to be committed to taking on the responsibility of receiving a gift. Nothing was what it seemed: there were multiple levels and many, many dark corridors. If I had to compare it to the challenges of today, it’s akin to finding where that last number 9 goes on the five-star Sudoku board …only the strong survived. This was at best a lifetime responsibility, and at worst, your dreams became tortured and turned into little vignettes of doom. It’s so contrary to today’s norms. Everything is just so disposable… no consequences, be happy.

Possibly I can convey what I mean by CCG by way of examples…not mine of course, just those I’m aware of. And, they’re ageless and will possibly make your own eyelids twitch….

CHILDHOOD

· “…and to go with those gloves are these skis, but don’t take them on a hill because you’ll get killed.”

· “These sweaters are a little big now (XXXXL), but you’ll grow into them later so put them away for now.”

· “…this new bicycle has 10 speeds, but you can only use the first 3, and never go into the street.”

· “Here’s you’re allowance of $3.00, but you can’t spend it on candy.”

· “This new ping pong table is all yours, but I don’t want your friends over to the house.”

· “This new radio is all yours, but you can’t use it until we’re certain you won’t swallow the batteries.”

· “Here’s a life-long membership for Karate school, but the moment I find you fighting, it’s over.”

· “I bought you ice cream for dessert, but you have to finish your tripe dinner first.”

· “Here’s a brand new pair of white all start Chuck Taylor Converse sneakers, but don’t get them dirty!”

TEEN AGE YEARS

· “You’ve earned your freedom, so this car is for you, but you’ll have to put gas in it - and it gets 1.3 mpg.”

· “Here’s a key to the house, but no friends over and I don’t want you in the house alone.”

ADULTHOOD

· “Here’s this stained glass ornament that has been passed down for generations, we think. And although we’re not sure who it originated from, or the significance of it, and although it’s kind of hideous looking, you are now the custodian of it and have to commit to safeguarding it for all eternity. Oh, and be careful with it because the corner has broken off.”

· “Don’t even think about re-gifting anything I’ve ever given you because even after I’m gone, I’ll be keeping my eye on you!”

So once again, I’m sure you’re left with the question, “What does this have to do with Christmas?” Well, we wanted to give the gift of pause (I really wanted it to be the gift of paws, but our cats were looking over my shoulder and ran under the bed) and possibly a little laughter. Oh by the way, you can’t share this with anyone.

Happy Holidays, Kids

Enjoy a few of Deb's favorite photos of the year...